Determined Advising: Filling in the Cracks

By Jared Mathewson, college adviser for Louisburg High School in Franklin County, N.C.

This has been a difficult year for teachers, staff and students alike. It has been a year of not only massive adjustments to our education system, but also a year of increased stressors on families as they try to get by in a crashing job market. While teachers and other staff have continued to try their best to accommodate students, it is difficult when students are demotivated by the lack of social interaction or have even picked up jobs to supplement their parents’ income.

A phrase we have heard over and over this year is, “We cannot let these students slip through the cracks,” but as we approach the end of this year it is just as easy for us to get fatigued. We put off doing some important tasks — often those that have been the least rewarding, such as reaching out to students. Having tried so hard over and over this year to reach out, we have cracked our own determination with frustration, doubts and negative thoughts about the responses we get from students. Today, I want you to try and reframe these thoughts, to fill in the cracks present in your determination.

I have learned throughout this year that advising is not about managing expectations. Regardless of the situation or the student, my expectations remain the same: that students have an actionable plan following graduation that fits their life goal. My expectation is that they all make that plan clear to me by the time they graduate. Advising this year has been far more about managing negative feelings and keeping my determination. I do my best every day to reframe things in a positive way, hype myself up when things are going well, and coast on that excitement through the down times. Sometimes, however, we need to take a source of negativity in our advising and completely replace it with something more productive. Something that makes you more determined. Make sure that instead of just giving up on reaching out completely or getting more frustrated, that you find some other activity that will still get you the information you need without wearing down your determination. 

To help prevent students from slipping through all the cracks our education system has, and all the ones exacerbated by the COVID-19 pandemic, we first need to take care of our own. If you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, take a break, reframe what you are doing into something positive, or seek motivation from a colleague. Do not let those cracks spread to the point you crumble. If you see cracks start to spread, reassess the situation; see if there is anything you can do differently to avoid feeling that way in the future and try to find a way to motivate yourself, to repair that determination. Some days are difficult, but our determination built from the good days can hold us up.